I’ll tell you a true story I think is funny and you can decide if it’s funny, ignorant, or factual.

Last year when I was having internal issues with my colon and diverticulitis, the gastroenterologist (thank you Google) asked if I drank too much alcohol.

I answered 5-8 drinks on a Friday and/or Saturday. She said that is too much and I am an excessive drinker which could be borderline abuse.

There was a giggle as I thought of all the people I’ve watched consume more than me while I sober up to give rides home and to make sure I’m 100 percent clear the next day to officiate a basketball, volleyball, baseball, or softball game, or to talk to people for stories.

There was a cackle as I thought of younger Brandon who would have scuffed at eight drinks and said, ‘Bro, step your game up.’

Then I almost went into hysterics as I thought about how much water I’ve been told I needed to drink two months prior when I was hospitalized for a week and had an IV feeding me everything because I couldn’t eat or drink.

More water requests were summoned my way between the hospital and this gastro visit.

When the gastroenterologist said what she said about my alcohol consumption, I instantly asked, ‘So, if I drink 8-10 glasses a water a day like you want me to, that’s not over consumption? That’s not putting too much of something in my body?’

She went flush for a second.

She looked down.

Then looked me in the eye and gave me doctor speech of how water can do no wrong, angel like, and alcohol is the devil.

Maybe laughing at her, in her face, wasn’t the right call, but it was the one I made during the play on the court known as the doctor’s office.

To her credit, she was professional and said what doctors will say about the benefits of water and told me I should drink water like I would alcohol and there shouldn’t be any issues.

To my credit, I asked an almost out of line but completely appropriate questions in a creative, realistic way… We can’t drink too much water? It can’t hurt our body?

The meeting or debate ended with her telling me I’d have to have a surgery to cut out a portion of my colon if something didn’t change.

I already knew this, and my diet had changed and was continuing to change. No more red meat. No more eating out. Limited sweets. If there was a flare up, go to a liquid diet and stop trying to act like nothing was happening, which I was guilty of previously.

And more water. However, not 10 glasses a day.

I’m a journalist, I looked for information to back up my argument of how drinking so much water could have negative effects.

Don’t get me wrong, there is more negatives behind alcohol than water, we should all know this, but at the same time I believe you can overindulge in everything, including agua.

From the Mayo Clinic, www.mayoclinic.org, when you drink too much water, your kidneys can’t get rid of the excess water. The sodium content of your blood becomes diluted, which is called hyponatremia and it can be life-threatening.

The Institute of Medicine recommends 3.7 liters of water a day for males, which is 15-16 cups, and 2.7 liters for females, which is 11-12 cups.

Quora.com says water excessiveness is when you chug two gallons (7.6 liters) because it can lead to overhydration or water intoxication.

I agree one or two glasses or cups of water isn’t enough, but 8-10, and especially 15-16 or 11-12, is excessive and isn’t doing anything but raising toilet flush tallies and the amount on the water bill.

Not to defy doctors or to risk health, I joyfully drink 5-8 glasses, more often 16.9 Fl. Oz. bottles, daily and have reaped the benefits.

The next time I saw the gastroenterologist I told her what I’d done, she ran her tests, checked for cancer (there was nothing), and she told me she’s OK with the compromise of finding a happy medium with water because I didn’t have to have the surgery as my colon was in better shape and would continue to be if I kept doing what I had done since I left the hospital.

Water can be good for you.

Alcohol can be good for you.

Water can be bad for you.

Alcohol can be bad for you.

Everything can be bad in over consumption.